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Saturday, June 18, 2011

She's the last of the American girls

do I really know you?
really, truly know you?
probably not
does that mean I don't want to?
false
I do
I really do
but will I?
that question doesn't really have an answer yet
it all depends on the varibles
what happens when
when do I see you
when do you see me
not soon
I have to wait
patience is a virtue, someone said
not for me
patience is pain
pain and loneliness
being so close
yet far away from you
it's tearing me apart
everyone else is happy
what about me?
what about me?
do I deserve it?
no
but it doesn't stop me from wanting it anyway
wanting their happiness
trying to feed off of their energy
feeling their happiness over my feelings
loneliness
anger
pain
frustration
confusion
it's too much
I have officially had enough
I'm done with the dreams
that fantasies
the imagining
the pretending
it's all fake
why can't it ever be real?
why is it never real for me?
it's not fair
but my life isn't either
I guess it balances out
most of the time
but
before you know it
someone comes along
and sends it all
tumbling
d
o
w
n







and then you
f
a
l
l




into it
you don't know what it is
but you feel it
you know you're not supposed to
but you do anyway
you can't help it
you can't help what you feel
you may try your hardest
with every fiber of your being
to be someone
different
but you just can't
but you
you don't care
you're just yourself
you don't care what anyone thinks
you be yourself
and that's all that matters to you
I need you
to change me
I want to be like you
I want to know you
but, then again
do I really know you?
really, truly know you?
probably not...

1 comment:

  1. i love the flow to this and some of the phrases. the emotions are so easily related to for everyone,or at least for me. loved it :)

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